The Sus-Rant SD! 7/23/11
For this edition of the Sus-Rant I decided to live blog watching Smackdown...so here are my epic notes from an entertaining if not pedestrian episode of Smackdown
+Christian calling out Randy Orton for being a moron is great.
+smiling Ezekiel Jackson is MEGA lame. But Booker T on mic is always fantastic.
+champion Vs champion to start the show. Reveals how little the E cares about "the world title" --- perfectible acceptable wrestling. So I can't complain too much
+I see now that Michael Cole is fat...and a poor interviewer
+Daniel Bryan announcing his MitB plans is pretty cool. It does set him up to be the first guy to lose his title match.
+Heath Slater is awful on the mic. Daniel Bryan using the frontfacelock as a legit hold makes me smile.
+replaying the Vince is fired angle from Monday is kind of lazy
+the blow off match between Shamus and Wade being on free TV is super annoying. These two should have been allowed to build their match up maybe have a turn or something. Saw the double count out coming a mile away. Really booked themselves into a corner, poor choices and whatnot.
+ Ok so not exactly setting the world on fire here...why would you were tiny pants to a "street fight"?
So why is this street fight mostly in the ring? Oh the Kendo Stick...NEW! INNOVATIVE!
Both men are former world champs, why is this not being discussed?
And I've just seen the openin for the next Botchamania.
Kane no-selling a shattered ankle to hit the big boot and the flying clothesline. Amazing.
Kicking out of the RKO is ballsy! Orton kicking out of the chokeslam makes this match an easy 3.5 stars.
RKO on a chair as the finish. Really good match. Made the show from "meh" to "man I'm glad I watched this."
The Sus-Man
The Sus-Review of RAW 7/18/11
As I sat down to watch Wrestling last I felt a weird sense over taking. It was nearly euphoric. I was actually excited to watch wrestling again. Something I can easily say I havent felt in years. The WWE has been moving in a direction that made me care less and less. That’s not to say I cared much at all to begin with, but with the over saturation of the UFC, I have felt a void in the Combat Sports center of my brain. It was time for something to happen to make me care again.
Enter CM PUNK and his amazing worked-shoot rant about his leaving the WWE with their main title. The internet exploded and I watched his rant on YouTube and said to myself, “Well hot damn something to care about!” This in turn made me watch the episode of SmackDown that followed the rant, and yes even IMPACT or TNA or whatever the hell they want to call themselves these days.
If I can just get off subject for a moment. What the hell is going on with that Orlando based promotion? Joker-Sting is pretty bizarre but having a Heel Stable made up of guys who have nothing in common except that they are heels, that’s just stupid. Pushing D-Von to the moon seems like maybe not a great idea either, but I digress.
So I watched SmackDown, I watched Raw again where PUNK was “reinstated” and I honestly felt annoyed I couldn’t get out of my house to go watch the Money In the Bank pay-per-view. I have to tell you it was one hell of a feeling to realize that I was once again acting like teenager. Somehow this one storyline had washed away the near decade of awful TV. To be frank PUNK even said it best during his “renegotiation episode.” The only thing pro-wrestling had been known for lately were deaths and steroids. But this whole story of “is he leaving or isn’t he?” It just made for some wonderful drama.
Then it happens. And the internet explodes and wrestling fans all over the world are trying to figure out what’s real and what’s staged and no one can really put their finger on what’s what. A very close friend who is always a genius level intelligence once told me that “Now that everyone knows that wrestling is fake thanks to shows like Tough Enough, maybe we should redefine what reality is.” It took years but its finally happened reality is once again up for grabs and the WWE has managed to capture this cynics attention.
Last nights RAW has already been dismissed as “Boring, dull, and nothing compared to the PPV.” Ok, but why is that a bad thing? Did the storyline progress? Did Vince try and reestablish his company’s champion? Doesn’t a one night tournament to crown a champion show how imperative it was that Vince correct his mistake? Was there no drama? Indeed, WERE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED? Why does everything have to be the greatest episode ever? I watched the entire show and while some segments were slow and some matches weren’t great, the overall feel of the show was “organized chaos” like the ship was sinking and everyone was just trying to toss the water out as fast as possible. I. LOVED. IT.
Now I just cant wait to see what happens next week on RAW. In the end, getting people like me to care again, isn’t that what they always wanted?
- The Susman
“Ric goes to a rock concert…”
“…finds out he is oldâ€
These last 5 days have been filled with GREAT excitement for The Sus-Man. It all started last Friday when I went to the Monster’s In the Morning, “Miss Monster Show.†Where I proceeded to get PISSY DRUNK with Cameron, Evan, and his friend Jim (I think). Saturday was BELIEVE II and I had an AMAZING time at that show and the after party that followed (but that story would be for a different time).
I had one more major event to take care of this week and that would be going back to the Hard Rock Live, which was where Miss Monster was, to see Modest Mouse. My very close friend and sister (we’re sisters, don’t ask may have something to do with me being a girl may not Ill have to check this out and report back) Indiana De La Cruz, informed me a few months ago that MM was coming to Orlando. I snapped up the first ticket I could and was JONSED from jump.
Why was I so happy for Modest Mouse? Easy. There album “Good News For People who love Bad News†is one of my top 5 favorite albums of all time, hands down no questions asked. That that album end to end defines a very big part of my life. So I had to go see them at least once I did not realize however that the show was on a Tuesday night. Whoops.
Indy and I arrive at the Hard Rock Live Café about 2 hours early for the concert enough time for a couple of drinks and some dinner. Turns out Indy and I love all the same really sappy awful, wonderful, music. We actually started singing the Dashboard Confessional songs (I blame Michelle (Nell) for my love of DC) and decide that should he ever be in town again we have to go see him and hold each others hands and sing all the songs by heart, this is what it means to be Emo.
Dinner for me includes ONE Gin & Tonic (I was driving after all) and a very nice burger that the HRC called “THE LEGEND†which I have to say was a very tasty burger. After waiting in a moderate line Indy and I were in the Hard Rock Live, making this the second time in 5 days Id been there. ***side note*** Cameron we pretty much stood in the exact same spot as Friday but there was no Jasmine to speak of at the bar this time.***end side note*** We stand around and chill in our spot making friends who ever was near by until finally Indy notices the young girl to our right had lovely red hair. Indy being wonderful, decides she has to touch this girls hair because of how amazing it looks.
Some how the girl doesn’t run in fear but actually appreciates the compliment from Indy, I stand there stunned because had I tried this same move I would have been arrested and beaten to death in seconds. The young girl continues to be a topic of comedy because Indy is obsessed with her hair. The night continues as we wait for the opening act. Finally after about 20 minutes of using her as a prop to our two man(wo) comedy show. I ask how old the young woman was. She was 16. I think holy fuck that 10 years younger than me…wow. 10 years is a long time to be older than someone and Im just sort of taken about for a bit.
Our fun times keep getting more and more wonderful as the young girl starts playing along with us and making her own jokes. Talking about how creepy I am for being around her, despite the fact that Indy was the one assaulting her. Which ultimately leads to me asking her what her name is;
“Ok so what’s youre name already.â€
“Amanda†She sticks out her hand to shake mine.
“Of course it is.†I say without missing a beat, then I shake my head.
Indy can attest to this being exactly how this happened. Indy then briefly explains that I have a deep seeded hate of Amanda’s brought on by a slight misunderstand with THE EX (quick reminder everyone THE EX is not just an ex-girlfriend of mine THE EX is someone I never refer to by name because I hate what she did that much). Well Young Amanda feels that I shouldn’t hate her because she isn’t blonde and never moved out on me. I have to agree her logic was sound. I then mention how this will end up being a GREAT post on our NERDboard. She asks if she can at least read the board and we have to explain that only like 10 people on Earth have the access to read this board, that’s how exclusively nerdy it is. I tell her that she can read my blog about it. She literally laughs at me and says, “You blog?†I very nearly ran screaming into the night when I realized that blogging is just NOT cool anymore. I have outlived blogging…Im 26. Wow.
Moments later the opening band took the stage. I maybe be off by one or two here but the seemed to be a 7 piece Jazz band from Bourbon St. NA’Leens. The crowd had no idea what to make of 6 black dudes playing horns (one on drums) and one white guy who looked like he could have been Hugh Laurie. As soon as they start playing I, along with some others just start vibing out to the smooth sounds. The crowd has NO idea what to make of this band what-so-ever and just stare blankly until they start playing “When the Saints come Marching in†and the place erupted. Everyone Indy, Myself, Amanda and her friends, EVERYONE was just so damn happy to be hearing this for whatever reason. We all danced and sang and just had a blast, they turned out to be a wonderful opening act that was off the stage at 845.
I thought this was a spot of great news because I figured (as Indy did) that MM would be on stage 915/930 at the latest. Yeah, no. The don’t hit the stage until 940 and suddenly I realize that this is going to be a LONG night for me. The first couple of songs I didn’t recognize right off the bat, maybe older stuff maybe newer that I haven’t listened to yet. But then the played DANCE HALL off of “Good News…†and I was in Heaven. Everyone started jumping around and singing it just felt great to be in a pretty non-aggressive pit having an absolute party.
At 1130 my back/legs/feet had enough and I needed some water. Somehow I timed my bitch-out-ness perfectly as the band left the stage after their encore. Good for me! Indy and I drove home with ringing ears and giant smiles. I ended up in bed at 1am and awake at 7am but I would do it all again in a heart beat. I maybe too old for this shit on a daily basis but Ill never be too old for one hell of a great night.
Speak to me my teeming masses!
The Sus-Man
“Sometimes unexpected guests…”
“Are the best guestsâ€
Last night I got home around the usual 420ish…take that as you will and proceeded to begin my laziness. I was quickly stirred from my slumber by the phone text of One Evan Michael Dobkin. Letting me know that Derek was in town and wanted to hang out tonight.
Derek is one of the many, many, many, people I met on my trip to Israel . He is a super cool dude who plays in a Beatles tribute band. Dude is legit amazing in vocals and a fantastic master of his guitar. As you may imagine I was all kinds of envious of him on the trip. Kid had the look, the style, the personality I would have wanted to have but never had the balls…or talent needed.
Still for as much as douche bag that Derek could have been, nothing ended up being further from the truth. He was just a truly awesome dude who was happy to try and make everyone feel better and just have a good time. I was super excited to hang out with someone from the trip since I hadn’t seen anyone save for Esther, Danny, and Rebecca and that was back in March anyway. Derek is from the Miami area and just happened to be up in Orlando for the Parks.
We met up at AleHouse and started drinking (well I was driving and I don’t need a DUI right now so I wasn’t drinking much) and just talking about the trip. Derek strats dropping knowledge that he has been working with Mitch (the other amazing musician of the trip) and they are about to start a big time event. I cant explain why I felt the way I did but when he and Evan and I all started talking I actually forgot where I was for a minute or two.
It was a hell of a felling to feel 15 years old again. It was like I was without a care in the world. Who cares that my work day sucked and was tiring? I was hanging out with someone who WENT TO ISRAEL with me! That has to be front page news. After the meal was paid and the brews consumed we went back to the house to watch HD NBA murder as the Celtics made-hate to the Lakers for 48 minutes. The group hung out and watched the game and listened to Derek’s music and for one night I forgot about my back, or trying to date again, or my job, I was just happy to be where I was.
Derek ended up crashing our on new couch and had to break out of Orlando before I woke up. I distinctly remember walking out of my bedroom and seeing the empty couch with burnt cig’s laying in a cup of black water and actually feeling sad. I sometimes wonder if this trip did more for me than I have even begun to realize.
Speak to me my teeming masses!
The Sus-Man
“Economically Stimulate My Nuts.â€
As I await my big GOMMAMINT PAYCHECK to drop magically out of the sky, I find myself reading about how this “plan†is working. So far the FIDDY Million that the GWB et al has sent to us has actually worked someone to help kick start the economy. But my question that is still not 100% answered is this. Where the hell did this money come from?
I have read that we should assume these are our Fax Returns for next year. That this isn’t just free money, its assumed money, so next year around April 2009 we are all BONED. Shitty news for a guy who celebrates his birthday in that month, I imagine I can expect a lot of “homemade†gift type things.
However I have to question the reasoning here, the government is trusting that families will go out and buy PS3’s and HD TVs and shit. You have a 2 income house with 3 kids and you get 1800 bucks from the USandA. But me, I maybe get 6hundy. I don’t get that. I am a 26 year old single male. I don’t require much to sustain myself. My job pays for my car and my house. Everything else I make is LITERALLY disposable income. Im not going to be spending this money on food, gas (thanks Dad), credit card bills, nothing.
I can blow this all on hookers and coke if I really wanted. I could goto a strip bar and stimulate the economy in 1 dollar bills. Making it rain on the world in the form of tiny Washington ’s. I don’t have to feed my kids all I have to do is spend money. So why then do I get the least amount of cake to help the economy?
I have friends/coworkers that have already told me they have no desire to spend this money. Its going directly into the savings account, or into a college fund. Where it will sit forever, and why not? I don’t blame them, I applaud them for being good parents. The trouble is for whatever reason, the brain trust in the Blanco House, figured. This would work like gangbusters. How? The economy is completely in the shit 600 bucks will get you 12 full tanks of gas. THAT’S IT, 12 tanks for 600 bucks. When my Dad was my age 600 bucks would fill up your tank for a year.
So of course families are going to spend this money as wisely as they can. But again that wasn’t the point of this cash crop. The idea was (or so it was explained to me by the fine folks of CNN) that this money was to be used on new shit that you bought at JC Penny’s, or Best Buy. Who better to take that kind of initiutive than single 20somethings? We all live check to check on the most and have no issue tossing money into the drink. So why not us?
Come on GWB let us clean up your shit, not like we wont have to in 15 years anyway, least you could do is give us a damn leg up.
Speak to me my teeming masses!
The Sus-Man
So do we ask too much?
After now hows that for a first half? In this second half I will get all philosophical about fans in general as I think this applies not just to wrestling fans but really anyone.
Are we asking too much from our heroes these days? Wrestling fans spent the first part of their lives believing these larger than life athletes are really killing each other (and you know the most part the actually are). But many of us eventually find out that the matches are a kind of staged ballet of sorts. Thanks to the internet (and before them newsletters) fans have become “smarter†to the wrestling business and now everyone with a blog thinks they know everything there is to know about wrestling (II). What?
First to answer the question posed to me by one Jesse Long. I actually do think a lot of fans ask WAY too much out of performers these days. My best example is a news story that leaked the other week about a wrestler wanting time off due to “burn out.†A fan (if you aint a wrestler/in the business youre a fan hoss) stated about how none of the “older generation†ever suffered burnout. To an extent this guy is right, you never heard of Larry Z or Harley Race taking time off for a reason other than injury. That’s because THEY COULDN’T. They had to work everyday to get paid, there was no such things as contracts. You worked, you ate. Period.
Also the road was a lot different for the older generation. You didn’t have to work 4 house shows and then do 1 to 2 live shows a week. That’s a lot of wrestling and as ANYONE who has ever taken a “bump†can tell you. It never gets easier. So I think we should expect to see guys taking more time off, they are human, and we don’t need another Benoit or Eddie situation happening again. Ever.
I suppose its deeper than that though, because so many “smart fans†expect an outcome to a match to go one way they tend to get annoyed when the wrestling company doesn’t give them what they expect. Or what they want. I find this most troubling since as a wrestling fan I WANT TO BELIEVE. I want to kick back and just pretend that anything could happen. When something unexpected happens I think it’s great.
The same could be said for basketball fans this year. Almost every home game has been home by the home team in the playoffs this year. A phenomenon that frankly has never happened before on such a grand scale and a lot of people are pissed. Saying that this HAS to be evidence that the games are fixed. How do you figure? Is it really so hard to believe that this is just happening because guys are playing harder for their fans?
Baseball fans (we are few and far between) are the worst. We want to see guys hit 84327509857 foot homeruns but then are SHOCKED and APPALLED when we find out these guys are gassed to the gills. We want to see super-human effort well that’s what it takes to be SUPER-human.
I could go on forever as you can imagine, but I guess I haven’t truly answered the question yet. Do I think fans as asking too much? Yes. But I also think they have been given too much and expect only what they have been trained to expect. If wrestlers looked like normal human beings things would be different. If refs didn’t cheat in the NBA people would just reveal in the fact that the teams are doing amazing, unprecedented things. If ESPN didn’t show us EVERY homerun hit, we’d likely care less about it.
Speak to me my teeming masses!
- The Sus-Man
“Let the duality COMMENCE!â€
For my inaugural blog on the THF.com I would like to discuss the things I will be discussing from here on in. Since this maybe the first time some of you have ever really had a chance to read my thoughts. Firstly you should know that The Sus-Man isn’t a character or anything I try to live my life as real and as honest as possible. I have taken a lot of flack over the years for my blunt, sometimes rude, honesty about my life.
What you should all know about me as of this moment is that I am 26 years old and work for one of the most powerful Law Firms in the southern half of the United States . My job is pretty important (well since I got the promotion) and I make a decent living. That’s the dull stuff. Now on to who I am…really.
I am at heart a hopeless romantic, or if you have to be an ass, a co-dependant. I lived alone for a few months when I was 22/23 and it was about the worst experience of my life. But many people would argue that humans were never meant to live alone anyway, so good for me I am clearly one of the sheep. I call myself “The Greatest Guy Ever†for one reason, and one reason only. Apparently I am. When I was younger and just starting out in college I was almost CONSTANTLY getting rejected. One girl who liked me but didn’t want to be with me at the time, looked and me and said, “Ric, you’re like the greatest guy ever, you know that?†I was so in awe of the fact that I was clearly the most eligible male on Earth, and yet SO un-dateable, that I made it something of a moniker.
From there I started transforming my mind and body. Every year I learn less and less, and trust me this is for the best. Since I knew everything on Earth when I was 16 and now at 26 I realize I still know about dick of this world, its been a long process of “de-learning.†Which ultimately leads me to where we are today, writing a blog and trying to hone my skillz (limited as they maybe) to lend some kind of help to whoever may need it. Or conversely causing hell, havoc, and hate to anyone looking for a nice nerd fight.
With the background covered I should actually get into the teeth of what you can expect from this blog. I have no interest in trying to be entertaining if that happens I apologize for the confusion. My Blog is my life. If Im in a bitchy mood because Im bogged down with work or just because I haven’t had my juicebox, well youre going to hear about it. If Im sad and retrospective about my life, then you will get that too, in essence this is my life. Free to public consumption and criticism. I welcome it.
So there you have it, the first in what I hope to be a daily update of things that are going on in my life. This weekend I am playing a large Poker Tourney so we at least know what Monday’s blog SHOULD be about.
Speak to me my teeming masses!
- The Sus-Man